Who Really Likes People Anyway?

Sounds mean, doesn’t it. I know! Hear me out though...

Whilst enjoying drinks on a patio this past Saturday night, my friend Megan was discussing all the juicy details of her trip to Africa. The highlight, according to her was a group safari trip in Namibia which was limited to her family and only one other person.

“Only one random lady!” she reported triumphantly. On a trip across the world, what made her most happy was not having to deal with a stranger. In case you were wondering, she was also quite impressed with incredible wildlife, food, and scenery.

Got me thinking though about our quest for solitude in everyday life. Have you ever seen two strangers sitting next to each other if they don’t need to be? Take waiting in the doctor’s office, for example. The minute a seat opens up that does not require sitting directly next to another person – that seat is taken!

Rewind to about two years ago. I was on the “Sotobo” train line in rural Chiba prefecture traveling from the hellish fishing town I taught in to the slightly less desolate capital of Chiba City. Imagine an amazingly unpacked train where at 10 pm in the evening, riders are few and far between. My 45 minute commute habitually turned into a snooze-fest and just before shutting my eyes for some sweet dreaming, a totally normal business man sat directly next to me. There were empty seats aplenty.

Weird? Yes.

Enough to move to another seat? No.

About 20 minutes later I was awoken by a jab to my ribs. Upon opening my eyes I was greeting with my neighbour, pants open, and his itty bitty manly parts exposed for my “viewing pleasure”. Unfortunately for him I yelled very loudly and took my cell phone (complete with a totally adorable Hello Kitty chime, of course!) and attempted to take his picture. He escaped before I snapped his shot – you can imagine it didn’t take long for him to put his itty bitty goods back into his pants. I never did see him again, but the experience reinforced why Megan was happy about her stranger-less safari ride.

Lesson to be learned here is that interaction with the public is not for the faint hearted. And for God’s sake, move to that empty seat!